You Might Be a Crossfitter if...

• you know Thrusters aren't as fun as they sound.
• you put bumper plates and kettle bells on your wedding registry.
• it takes you longer to recover from the workout than to do it.
• you can yell "Nice Snatch" in a room full of ladies and not get slapped.
• you jerk for time.
• you workout in a box, not a gym.
• when traveling, you wonder if you can kip on the hotel shower curtain bar.
• someone stares at you with a "you're craaaaaazzzzzyyy" look after you describe your WOD.
• a manicurist turns you away.
• you believe in sweat angels.
• your affinity with other Crossfitters is instant and sincere.
• you refresh your browser every 30 seconds after 9pm.
• you've learned not to say "That looks easy".
• you don't understand why tomorrow's WOD can't be posted at 7:30am.... after you just finished today's at 7:15am.
• you can come home, tell your wife "I did Barbara today!" and she congratulates you.
• you find yourself bragging to people how sore you are.
• you will do 3 on, 1 off come hell or high water.
• you would be pissed if the box closed on Easter, Xmas, New Year's or July 4th.

And my personal favorite:

• you've seriously considered installing handicap bars in your OWN toilet.

Xfit Prizes and Progress Report

It's been a while since my last blog because I've had little interesting to say. Doubtful this blog will change that, but here it goes.

Xfit Prizes

We have an attendance board at Xfit now.  Dutifully, I mark my "x" everyday thinking back to 3rd grade and those bitchin' gold stars I used to get. I'm a sucker for tracking my performance, especially for something easy like "showing up". My work brethren aren't doing so hot on the "attendance" board. Some BS about leg contusions, concussions, and walking pneumonia. The good news is they are still paying but not taking up valuable pull-up bar real estate. Keep it up guys!! P.S. Check the blog for the ACTUAL times to show up.

Anyway, the board made me think, we need Xfit prizes. Yeah, I know that the whiteboard scores are the prize for many. Beating a "teammate" is satisfying. However, the "lower middle 1/3" of scores (i.e. 1 arm, old fat guys) need our own rewards. My proposed list:

1. Loudest grunt (dB level).
2. Largest sweat pool (measured by diameter).
3. Thickest pull-up callous (Holland measures with her calipers).
4. Loudest bitching about the current workout.
5. Most tape used per session (feet)
6. Most steals of someone else's pull-up band (# per session).
7. Loudest bitching about the previous workout.
8. Highest heart rate without an ER visit. (This one is mine!)
9. Longest disappearance during the last 800m run.

And finally, the "I met Pukey" award!! (No limit to the number of these per session.)

Progress Report

Great news. I'm still fat, so I can keep the blog title a little longer.

Energy and Eating: My energy level is scary at times. I see food as fuel and my choices are all about how I want to feel over the next 12 hours. It is amazing how different my body feels now that I have straightened out my fueling. I biked (casually) for 2 hours on Saturday and it was pleasant. Two months ago I would have considered it a serious workout.

Body Measures: My scale weight is down 25 lbs. I've lost at least 30lbs of fat and gained 5lbs of muscle as well. Blood pressure down 35 or 40 points... in TWO MONTHS! I went from the top range of pre-hypertension to firmly in normal. My resting heart rate dropped from 75 to 62. My weight goal is to be down 30 by the end of April and down 50 by the end of July. I want to hit my target weight loss (of 60lbs) by September.

Workout Measures: Stronger... beastly so in certain exercises. Struggling with others and for the first time, I am finding some limitations. I fantasize about flipping up into a handstand, but just not sure how the heck it will ever happen. If anyone has experience with 1.5 arm hand-stands, I'm all ears! Still trying to work up to a 1 arm pull up. :D Xfiters beware. When I get there, we will have a Bryon workout with lots of 1 arm exercises LOL! My cardio is coming along well, but still have a while before I don't rest too much during workouts.

Until next time...